Having a dog is a lot of work and something I'm not always great at, especially with 3 kids. Finding the time for it all is completely overwhelming. So when I came home with my dog Sir unexpectedly, let's just say he wasn't exactly welcome. I didn't discuss this with my husband, I just made an impulsive decision and brought him home.
To say that I am a mess, in my opinion, is a complete understatement. I am all over the place. I'm the girl who is having 3 or 4 conversations at the same time without ever finishing a thought about any of them. I have numerous "projects" going on, none even close to being finished.. I am messy when I eat, I have piles of unfinished projects, laundry and bags all over my house filled with things I haven't put away. My mind is constantly on "crazy" mode as my sister likes to say. I forget almost everything even when I log it into my Google calendar and set a timer, probably because I most likely wrote it in wrong to begin with. My husband has a horrible work schedule, yeah I said it, horrible. His shifts are all over the place so it leaves me with little help on most days. I am a mom to 3 kids and they all have schedules to keep, parties to be at, practices to attend and homework to get done. I also own a business with my sister. I guess some would say I do have a lot going on. If it wasn't for my friends and family (you know who you are) that keep me sane and in the loop with reminders I would have some very unhappy kids. I'm crazed, forgetful, loud, passionate, messy, unorganized, and erratic. I'm me, simply complicated me.
For years I worried tremendously about what others thought of me. I constantly stressed myself out trying to keep a neat house, dinner cooked every night, exercise, eat healthy, have the right clothes, make up, oh the list can go on and on. I have come to a point in my life where I am fully accepting of what I am and what I am not. Now I'm not saying that I'm giving up or conforming to my disastrous tendencies but I am willing to admit where I am at this point in my life. I am messy because I have chosen to be. Having my house neat and organized is something I'd love to have but with all that I have going on it has been on the back burner. I will put down what I'm doing to watch a movie with my 4 year old, even if it's a movie we've seen a million times (Frozen). Play rehearsals, baseball, soccer, movie nights even watching documentaries with my husband. Finally accepting this about myself has helped with my overall outlook. I try my hardest every single day to do better than I did the day before and that has to be enough. At this point in my life my children are young and I want to enjoy every moment I have with them. I'm hoping as they get older they won't remember me as this crazy lady who was forgetful and messy but rather as their Mom who loved them with all she had.
This was shared with me by another mom It had me in tears. Being a mother is so overwhelming and sometimes unbearable. If you are a mom "you know". This is the link to her post.